The art of openness “objective”

As I ordered a drink at my favorite “hole in the wall” I look at my friends all having a good time except for one. Josh is a good guy and he seems like he has good intent but he looks sad enough to be on a Hallmark card. A great guy indeed just got a raise at his accounting job and he has a great place where any bachelor would love to have. I was wondering why none of the women he was talking to would not give him the time of day. Pulling Josh over to my side of the room I tell him that I would like to be his “Wingman”. Overly excited he was happy that someone was going to help him out with the girls that were giving no responses.

Walking around him pointed to two beautiful girls underneath the dance floor while he scheming for better chances. I knew I was going to have to dance even though I was hoping they were sitting down, usually it is easier to keep my self with a better value if I talk to them. Walking over there with a slump and walking a little to fast he leans over and asks the taller of the two if she would like to dance a tall gorgeous brunette from Wichita Kansas looking at him for a second and then back at her friend shrugging then backing into him rubbing her butt all over him. The shorter of the two was a blond who is a nurse at the local hospital, leaning in to her I ask her to dance to keep her entertained while he works his swerve on the other friend.

As the song nears the end the brunette starts to become bored and walks off leaving me still in tact with her friend. Looking at me Josh was wondering why the blond stayed with me and the brunette took off. There is going to be a discussion I needed to tell him about what he did not do that is killing his game.

The lost post I wrote about is “Social Objectiveness” basically teaching you social value within a structured environment and now I am going to release another small portion of how to win over your objective. Within all great “Ladies men” you notice that there is an entirely different person and how they present themselves to others. One thing that I do know about the opposite sex is: they are still human and being human they still establishes boundaries and how they react to outside connections. Have you thought about it for a little bit, why your approach is not winning them over? You are afraid of talking to them right? The same with them being afraid of you so let’s look at how to use the openness technique where you don’t creep them out!

First thing is first:

Body Language- I preach this time and time again but no one listens, 95% of communication between humans is not even portrayed with words. Your body will tell the other person on how you are and how you react; you stereotype someone not on how they talk but how they act. Creating the great persona of body language is only steps away just by opening up. Don’t cross your arms, Don’t fidget, Head up, arms out, shoulders back, these are the classic characteristic of showing attractiveness but also showing you are confident and nice to talk to.

Smile- this is also a big problem people have, they don’t smile. Think about it would you rather be talking to someone who is happy or sad, it is only a given that you would like to speak to someone to who is happy and willing to talk to you and is “open” SMILE!!!

Dominate- So people don’t take this is the wrong terms, this is a term I use when telling someone to dominate the conversation meaning to use dominating actions, like leaning over her when speaking, showing interest by leaning in to listen to her words, using open arms to show her your domination.

Approach- now that we have talked about this we are going through a scenario

1)      walk up to her using a confidence swerve (walking slower with your head up and smiling)

2)      approach to the side- don’t go head on because if you do you will put a defense mechanism ( try to approach to the side so it gives her not a lot of time to assess the danger)

3)      use something out of the ordinary when first saying something- this is key because women needs to be exposed to new things not the same old routine because they have heard it a million times over, my buddy enjoys telling taller girls this one “ Man you are tall but you want to know something? We are all the same size in bed” he said this to a tall sexy dentist and she stayed attached to him all night.

4)      Conversation- this is key in making her more comfortable with you, this is wear you grab her, most guys go to the dance floor hoping that the bumping and grinding will do the trick but it is within the way you speak to her. Ask open ended question but don’t ask anything to personal, show interest by having total dedication on what she says and a rebuttal good or bad but say something on how you approve or disapprove.

5)      Confidence in control- this is key, if you know how to control a conversation you can control on how the rest of the night goes, leading her to where you guys can get more in-depth and ordering for her and …the list goes on and on but don’t go overboard. Allow her to make decisions as well, have her order the shots even though they will probably be girly ones!!

So the whole point of this Post is to be more open to your advances and realize that you could be scaring her if you advance in a way that sets off her defense. Don’t act desperate and act confident and remember the worst thing they can say is NO.  Practice makes perfect peeps so happy hunting!